I have a confession to make; as much as I avow that I have more of a “savory” than “sweet” tooth, there is something about Halloween candy that totally kicks that statement to the curb.
If I had to narrow it down it would be those stupid-ass fruit-flavored Tootsie Rolls — you know the ones — they only make them this time of year; the rest of the year it’s just the chocolate Tootsies, and they usually only come in the bite-size or the 6” size.
I purposely avoid buying Halloween candy until the day itself, as that at least will ensure that we will have candy to pass out to the 3-4 trick-or-treaters we get.
Chuck made it clear that he wants the mini Snickers Bars, so today on my way home – from a grueling step-aerobics class, no less – I stopped by Albertson’s to pick some up.
Snickers don’t interest me that much, so I figured I would peruse the selection and see if there was perhaps a little something that would tempt my own Trick-or-Treat taste buds.
I saw nothing of interest to me in the main candy area, but calling to me from the end of a nearby aisle, there it was: that jumbo bag of my chewy favorites, consisting of Dots and – you guessed it – Multi-size and multi-flavored Tootsie Rolls. No Tootsie Pops in that bag, either; apparently they have proven to be the last thing anyone wants, therefore lasting in some households until Easter – perfect!!
Now, you know how in some cartoons a character will have a Good Conscience – usually
in the form of an angel – on one shoulder that tries to preach the right thing to do; while the devilish Bad Conscience sits on the other shoulder and tries to justify the virtues of doing the wrong thing.
My consciences basically consist of a thin, glowing, happy, yet somewhat boring Kelly; and an indulgent, jolly, chubby and somewhat rascally Kelly. (being a complex person myself, did you really expect my consciences to be anything but complex, themselves?)
“You know you have no self control, especially with the Tootsies, dear,” Thin Kelly pleaded.
Indulgent Kelly butted in, “Yeah, but this is the only time of the year when you can get those awesome fruit-flavored Tootsies; and there are Dots in that bag, too, and none of those stinkin’ Tootsie Pops! You’re golden! Go for it!”
Thin Kelly politely interjected, “Are you forgetting that it was Dots that pulled out your bridge last month, causing you $50.00 worth of dental work? The same thing can happen with those Tootsies if you chew them on the left side of your mouth.”
“Screw the bridge! So chew on the right! Chew on the right!!”
“You’ll make yourself sick, like you always do.”
“So stop when you start to feel a bit queasy. It’s one time out of the year when you can get this stuff!”
Next shot shows me standing at the register with Snickers and the big bag of chewy favorites, while Indulgent Kelly thumbed her nose at Thin Kelly.
(From that point I gave both consciences the rest of the day off, but I have a feeling they’ll be back tomorrow.)
Once home, I opened the bag, and before I even got Griffin out the door for his walk I downed a small box of Dots, a fat chocolate Tootsie Roll, then a little cherry one, then orange, then lemon. Let the madness begin.
Once home from our walk I made a point – after a few more morsels – to dump half of the candy into a bowl for the Trick-or-Treaters, and the rest into a plastic pumpkin that I set off to the side, out of my main path.
Later, after my nap, I ate no candy, but instead had a delicious bowl of home-made pork noodle soup. I thought about bringing the candy into work for my afternoon shift, but I got a text from Indulgent Kelly saying, “Ah, gimme a break! When’s the last time any of your co-workers brought in anything that delish? The candy stays here!”
Perhaps it would be wise to put some of the candy away for the next get-together at our house, which happens to be the weekend of November 10th; out of sight, out of mind, at least for now. The friends I am having over will surely appreciate my sharing, and I will have the opportunity to make my chewy favorites last a bit longer.
Wait, whose logic was that? Could it be a harmonious convergence of my two consciences? Following Jolly Kelly’s “Just eat it!” advice, I initially did allow myself to devour about a dozen Tootsies and 2 boxes of Dots; but once up from my nap I had no candy craving, and instead gravitated toward something more nutritious, soothing, savory and just as delicious, in the form of that soup.
Come to think of it, when I first devoured all that candy this morning I hadn’t had anything to eat for about 5 hours. Could it have been that I was actually hungry, and the candy easily accessible?
Not sure where I’m going here…is it about balance? Following your cravings? Listening to your conscience(s)? Am I over-analyzing?
Meanwhile, make no mistake, there will more than likely be more candy-eating tonight – it is Halloween after all – but will that be all, or do I plan to have some dinner as well?
Dinner, definitely, with Chuck – out in our awesome neighborhood of Hillcrest, watching all the Halloween festivities. A great way to wrap up the holiday.
Speaking of wrapping up, I had best do just that, here; it’s almost time to go home and get those festivities started.
Happy Halloween, Everyone!!! Thanks for “indulging” me!